Setting the record straight…

Author: Kim  //  Category: Misc, Uncategorized

My friend Sandy sent me this in email at work from an unknown source.  I enjoyed it so much I thought I would share.  Have a read, enjoy and tell me at least half of this doesn’t ring true for you and your furball(s)?  :)

The following was found posted very low on a refrigerator door.

Dear Dogs and Cats:
The dishes with the paw prints are yours and contain your food. The other dishes are mine and contain my food. Placing a paw print in the middle of my plate and food does not stake a claim for it becoming your food and dish, nor do I find that aesthetically pleasing in the slightest.

The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack. Racing me to the bottom is not the object. Tripping me doesn’t help because I fall faster than you can run.

I cannot buy anything bigger than a king sized bed. I am very sorry about this. Do not think I will continue sleeping on the couch to ensure your comfort.  However, dogs and cats can actually curl up in a ball when they sleep. It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other, stretched out to the fullest extent possible. I also know that sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out on the other end to maximize space is nothing but sarcasm.

For the last time, there is no secret exit from the bathroom! If, by some miracle, I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not necessary to claw, whine, meow, try to turn the knob or get your paw under the edge in an attempt to open the door. I must exit through the same door I entered. Also, I have been using the bathroom for years – canine/feline attendance is not required.

The proper order for kissing is: Kiss me first, then go smell the other dog or cat’s butt. I cannot stress this enough.

Finally, in fairness, dear pets, I have posted the following message on the front door:


(1) They live here. You don’t.
(2) If you don’t want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture. That’s why they call it ‘fur’-niture.
(3) I like my pets a lot better than I like most people.
(4) To you, they are animals. To me, they are adopted sons/daughters who are short, hairy, walk on all fours and don’t speak clearly.

Remember, dogs and cats are better than kids because they:

(1) eat less
(2) don’t ask for money all the time
(3) are easier to train
(4) normally come when called
(5) never ask to drive the car
(6) don’t hang out with drug-using people
(7) don’t smoke or drink
(8) don’t want to wear your clothes
(9) don’t have to buy the latest fashions
(10) don’t need a gazillion dollars for college and
(11) if they get pregnant, you can sell their children.

Your Faithful Owner…

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Author: Kim  //  Category: Isabella, Sasha, Uncategorized

What’s in a nickname and how the heck do our pets know all of theirs? I have been thinking about Sasha a lot lately. This morning was no exception and for some reason my thoughts were focused around her many nicknames. Isabella even has a few herself and I started contemplating how our pets relate to our usage of nicknames.

According to Wikipedia: A nickname (also spelled “nick name”) is a descriptive name given in place of or in addition to the official name.

So I get it, typically it’s the shortened version of a name. Yes, Sasha was quite often called Sashie and Isabella’s mom calls her Izzy. But what about those nicknames that are really just terms of endearment. A name, when heard, which seem to evoke feelings of warmth and joy for humans who understand them and allow the subject to feel a strong sense of being loved. For Sasha there were the typical ones; Precious, Pretty Pretty Princess, Baby Girl, Sweet Pea. For Isabella it’s Princess, or our family’s particular favorite: Flomar (a warm furry friend according to Dennis in “The Martian Child“). Do our pets feel those same feelings of satisfaction when bestowed with our endearments?

As smart as I think animals are, especially Sasha, I assume the emotion we emit when using such a nickname is what is picked up by our pets as opposed to the name itself. But for many, nicknames are more humorous or even at times a reason for embarrassment. How do our pets interpret those?

Sasha, as I said, had many nicknames, some very creative and some more animated than others. A few more of hers;  Sashie Versache, Sashanator, Sashquatch. I can recall her antics when met with a whimsical “Hi there Sashie Versache”.  Yet, as much as she resembled a seal with her big round eyes (Exhibit A), for some reason we never came up with a related nickname that drew upon that.  

Exhibit A

Exhibit A

She was also affectionately called Poop-neck which was derived from the fact that on more than one occasion she was caught “applying herself with an ode ‘de poop” which is a nice way to say she was caught rolling in poop.( Exhibit B) I suppose there is a transference of emotion we convey when using such nicknames as well? I can remember her look of shame when bestowed the poop-neck title! That just wasn’t proper for a sweet little girl like her!  

Exhibit B

Exhibit B

I find we (pet owners) often borrow food items as nicknames too. In our family’s case it seems to be snack foods. Hmmmm, what’s that telling us? Maybe it’s just another expression of playfulness! Shasha was often referred to as Popcorn and Isabella is still referred to as Peanut, perhaps even more frequently than she is called Isabella! It depends on if she’s being a good girl or bad girl! ;-)

My final observation: nicknames express emotions. There seems to be some sense of security that comes from the familiarity and informality of a nickname. Whatever the subconscious reason, we all use nicknames and potentially sometime may even abuse nicknames!

Next Post: Top Ten nicknames for dachshunds, send me your suggestions!  

Peanut, Popcorn and Punky

Peanut, Popcorn and Punky

Sasha baby, come see me in my dreams soon!

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