Bring it on…

Author: Kim  //  Category: Isabella, Misc, Sasha

Having been confused with my feelings about the holidays  for most of my life, I was really dreading this season and how hard it might be as our first Christmas without Sasha.   The first bittersweet feelings  began when the store Christmas displays started popping up the day-after Halloween.  That’s when it always starts for me, the little burning sensation inside of anxiety.  While  the world quickly becomes consumed with finding that elusive Elmo doll, I begin the internal torment of bringing on myself an undeserved fear of the holidays.

 The good news is this year things were, well, a little different.  I made it through Christmas much easier than I thought I would.  Oh there were tears for sure, but not the kind I expected.   I felt as if Sasha was around in sprit, determined to take the typical confusion of the holiday and give it a purpose.   This year, I knew why I was sad…  Oddly comforted, Christmas was spent enjoying a nice quiet day with the kids.  (BTW, having grown kids ROCKS!  It’s a whole different dynamic, especially when you all like each other. )

 Here we are on New Year’s day!  A day for reflection, a day for new beginnings.  A few tears of sadness, a few tears of joyful memories and a lot of hope and excitement for the future!  Sasha will continue to sprinkle my days with her memories and I pray that never changes.   She’s right there in the distance with Grandma Susie, enjoying a better place!

 My New Year’s wish to everyone is “May your fond memories of those lost before you bring you strength to rally through the difficult trials life brings.”

 A new year, a new beginning, a new outlook…let’s see what 2010 has in store!

Happy New Year to all!

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