The following was found posted very low on a refrigerator door.

Dear Dogs and Cats:
The dishes with the paw prints are yours and contain your food. The other dishes are mine and contain my food. Placing a paw print in the middle of my plate and food does not stake a claim for it becoming your food and dish, nor do I find that aesthetically pleasing in the slightest.

The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack. Racing me to the bottom is not the object. Tripping me doesn’t help because I fall faster than you can run.

I cannot buy anything bigger than a king sized bed. I am very sorry about this. Do not think I will continue sleeping on the couch to ensure your comfort.  However, dogs and cats can actually curl up in a ball when they sleep. It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other, stretched out to the fullest extent possible. I also know that sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out on the other end to maximize space is nothing but sarcasm.

For the last time, there is no secret exit from the bathroom! If, by some miracle, I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not necessary to claw, whine, meow, try to turn the knob or get your paw under the edge in an attempt to open the door. I must exit through the same door I entered. Also, I have been using the bathroom for years – canine/feline attendance is not required.

The proper order for kissing is: Kiss me first, then go smell the other dog or cat’s butt. I cannot stress this enough.

Finally, in fairness, dear pets, I have posted the following message on the front door:

NOTICE TO ALL NON-PET OWNERS WHO VISIT AND LIKE TO COMPLAIN ABOUT OUR PETS:

(1) They live here. You don’t.
(2) If you don’t want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture. That’s why they call it ‘fur’-niture.
(3) I like my pets a lot better than I like most people.
(4) To you, they are animals. To me, they are adopted sons/daughters who are short, hairy, walk on all fours and don’t speak clearly.

Remember, dogs and cats are better than kids because they:

(1) eat less
(2) don’t ask for money all the time
(3) are easier to train
(4) normally come when called
(5) never ask to drive the car
(6) don’t hang out with drug-using people
(7) don’t smoke or drink
(8) don’t want to wear your clothes
(9) don’t have to buy the latest fashions
(10) don’t need a gazillion dollars for college and
(11) if they get pregnant, you can sell their children.

Your Faithful Owner…

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I lay there while she is snoozing away comfortably and I realize the amount of contortion my body is in to accommodate her.  It’s not entirely her fault I must concede, as I am certainly guilty of adjusting my own body position to take advantage of her radiating heat.  Who needs an extra blanket when you have a dachshund under the covers?  Nonetheless, at this point I realize I’m extremely uncomfortable and I’m sure my discomfort is due to the fact that she is stretched out crossways instead of lengthwise in the bed.  A few adjustments, ah…comfort AND warmth!  I know however that before dawn arrives I will likely go through this same pattern of adjustment a few more times.  Why must she fight the natural alignment of the bed?  Why must she lay with her butt on the pillow and her head declined?  Doesn’t the blood rush to her head?  Comfort and warmth aside however, I now lay there in the wee late hours WIDE AWAKE… 

 I’m a light sleeper anyway and a typical night follows a similar pattern at our house.  It goes something like this:  

First, Isabella plays a few rounds of “bed hopping” as we like to call it. This is her trying to decide where she will begin her evening of slumber.  I say begin because the evening usually includes several rounds.  

Fifteen minutes here, thirty minutes there and we all join in for a quick rendition of ”make up your mind silly girl and just decide”!  The problem is, even once she decides and we are all settled in snug as bugs in a rug…she usually continues to play by herself.  

She will get up and go check on Bubby or her momma and just when I find myself teetering on the brink of sleep I hear the familiar jingle of her “necklace” (aka collar and tags) as she attempts to jump back into my bed… which of course she can’t quite make…not without several tries anyway, which leads to a guilt trip because of the whole dachshund bad back problem and so on…  So, I sit up and lean over the edge of the bed to lift her up and what does she do???  Of course she backs up just out of reach…Argh, now we play a few rounds of this where I lay back down, she whimpers, I sit up to help, she steps back out of reach and now I’m sure I hear her mockingly singing nah, nah, nana boo boo…  I know where she learned this too! It was one of Sasha’s favorite games as a puppy, that and drop the toy off the edge of the bed to see how many times I’ll pick it up for her! (which  she also taught Isabella, but that’s another post.)

Once in bed and settled in, she migrates into the aforementioned body position.  Readjustment…Rinse and repeat…you get the picture.  No wonder I’m not sleeping well.

Isabella never used to sleep with me but when Sasha passed away and her Momma was still off at college she started sleeping with me pretty consistently.  (This of course has her mother quite upset now that she has moved back home from school and Isabella has not settled back into sleeping with her regularly again but this is yet another post.) 

So as I finally settle back into slumber, I start thinking about how both Sasha, and now Isabella too sleep stretched out so long, at least at night.  Who would think this was a small little miniature dachshund laying down the entire length of my leg?   If I think about how they sleep during the day it’s quite different!    During the day, unless playing or basking in the sun, they are usually in variations of two positions. It really depends on the message they wish to convey… 

The first, I call the typical dachshund multi-purpose.  

 It can be used in several situations:

• What, I didn’t do it! Look at me, I’m so innocent, I would NEVER!
• You’re about to leave without me aren’t’ you? How DARE you leave me alone again!
• My ball rolled under the couch and I’m so sad because NO ONE will help me get it back for the 100th time!
• Whatever you’re eating sure looks tasty! If you loved me you’d let me have some!

The second is the standard “cat-nap” pose…curled up with their nose tucked neatly near their rear end.  Let me just say one thing: nothing looks more precious!  So calm and quiet and innocent <looking>.

Maybe all dogs do this? Sleep differently day vs night.  I rarely wake up and find Isabella curled up at night! Is it comfort?  Maybe exhausted from the day?  I mean, they must be worn out from a busy day of squirrel chasing, tail wagging and trouble making, not to mention all the cat napping?   

 Well, whatever the reason, I’m happy that she’s getting a good night’s sleep in the end but her nights of “ring-around-the-bed posts” are leaving me waking in the morning still just plain dog tired…

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 The good news is this year things were, well, a little different.  I made it through Christmas much easier than I thought I would.  Oh there were tears for sure, but not the kind I expected.   I felt as if Sasha was around in sprit, determined to take the typical confusion of the holiday and give it a purpose.   This year, I knew why I was sad…  Oddly comforted, Christmas was spent enjoying a nice quiet day with the kids.  (BTW, having grown kids ROCKS!  It’s a whole different dynamic, especially when you all like each other. )

 Here we are on New Year’s day!  A day for reflection, a day for new beginnings.  A few tears of sadness, a few tears of joyful memories and a lot of hope and excitement for the future!  Sasha will continue to sprinkle my days with her memories and I pray that never changes.   She’s right there in the distance with Grandma Susie, enjoying a better place!

 My New Year’s wish to everyone is “May your fond memories of those lost before you bring you strength to rally through the difficult trials life brings.”

 A new year, a new beginning, a new outlook…let’s see what 2010 has in store!

Happy New Year to all!

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Most of all today (and everyday) I’m thankful for the many memories of Sasha.  She will always be in my heart.  (I miss you baby girl!)

Gobble, Gobble and Happy Thanksgiving!

Kim

Happy Thanksgiving all!! I’m thankful for a family who loves and supports me even if I don’t know what I’m doing in life or where I’m going. I’m also thankful for a beautiful healthy dog which brings me smiles every day. I’m thankful for a handful of great friends and to have a good paying job in this sluggish economy. And last but not least, I’m thankful for good food on the table this holiday!

Love, Tristian!

I’m thankful for bones, turkey, squeaky toys, bouncy balls, turkey, peanut butter, sunshine, turkey, long walks to the park, turkey, friends, our kitty cat, carrots, turkey, naps, my Bubby and two Mommies!

Love, Isabella!

P.S. I can has some turkey????

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9) Doxie (or Dachsie)

8) Oscar Mayer Dog

7) Wienerschnitzel Dog

6) Shortie

5) Brat (or Bratwurst)

4) Stretch

3) Frankfurter Dog

2) Hot Dog

1) Weenie Dog (or Wiener Dog)

A dachshund by any other name is still two dogs long and a half a dog high! :-)

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According to Wikipedia: A nickname (also spelled “nick name”) is a descriptive name given in place of or in addition to the official name.

So I get it, typically it’s the shortened version of a name. Yes, Sasha was quite often called Sashie and Isabella’s mom calls her Izzy. But what about those nicknames that are really just terms of endearment. A name, when heard, which seem to evoke feelings of warmth and joy for humans who understand them and allow the subject to feel a strong sense of being loved. For Sasha there were the typical ones; Precious, Pretty Pretty Princess, Baby Girl, Sweet Pea. For Isabella it’s Princess, or our family’s particular favorite: Flomar (a warm furry friend according to Dennis in “The Martian Child“). Do our pets feel those same feelings of satisfaction when bestowed with our endearments?

As smart as I think animals are, especially Sasha, I assume the emotion we emit when using such a nickname is what is picked up by our pets as opposed to the name itself. But for many, nicknames are more humorous or even at times a reason for embarrassment. How do our pets interpret those?

Sasha, as I said, had many nicknames, some very creative and some more animated than others. A few more of hers;  Sashie Versache, Sashanator, Sashquatch. I can recall her antics when met with a whimsical “Hi there Sashie Versache”.  Yet, as much as she resembled a seal with her big round eyes (Exhibit A), for some reason we never came up with a related nickname that drew upon that.  

Exhibit A

She was also affectionately called Poop-neck which was derived from the fact that on more than one occasion she was caught “applying herself with an ode ‘de poop” which is a nice way to say she was caught rolling in poop.( Exhibit B) I suppose there is a transference of emotion we convey when using such nicknames as well? I can remember her look of shame when bestowed the poop-neck title! That just wasn’t proper for a sweet little girl like her!  

Exhibit B

I find we (pet owners) often borrow food items as nicknames too. In our family’s case it seems to be snack foods. Hmmmm, what’s that telling us? Maybe it’s just another expression of playfulness! Shasha was often referred to as Popcorn and Isabella is still referred to as Peanut, perhaps even more frequently than she is called Isabella! It depends on if she’s being a good girl or bad girl! ;-)

My final observation: nicknames express emotions. There seems to be some sense of security that comes from the familiarity and informality of a nickname. Whatever the subconscious reason, we all use nicknames and potentially sometime may even abuse nicknames!

Next Post: Top Ten nicknames for dachshunds, send me your suggestions!  

Peanut, Popcorn and Punky

Sasha baby, come see me in my dreams soon!

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Little ones sneaking and full of fright!

They run between houses and into the streets,

Giving up tricks and looking for treats!

Hoping for candy corn, caramel and gum

Licorice, tootsie rolls, Mary Janes, oh YUM!

 When all is done they depart in a hush…

Such disappointment, it’s just a toothbrush!

Tonight many ghosts and goblins abound,

And on this Halloween, a 4 legged little witch is found!

Trick or Treat!!!

Let's go for a ride on my brooooom!

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A lot of colors and A LOT of leaves!  Leaves still clinging to the branches, swaying back and forth with the breeze, making their own music.  Leaves taking flight, floating through the air riding waves of wind.  Leaves swirling around on the sidewalks in a tornadic frenzy, ready to find their way into our homes and cars.

I remember as a child having to rake leaves on the weekend.  It was quite common to see families working together in the yard making leaf piles every 5 feet or so apart.  The trick being to get them sacked up before the next wind came and disrupted the neatness and order that had been created.  I remember wanting desperately to play in the leaves and kick them around, having fun as opposed to the drudgery I had been sentenced to.  There was such a potential for fun but the reality was it really didn’t feel that good to drop back into a pile of leaves, the hard ground still painfully evident below them and besides, it was such a daunting chore that came before all else and you just wanted to get it over with.  No going to ride bikes with friends, no watching TV, no heading to the park until the task was complete and 8 or 9 tightly bound, black plastic bags stood proudly by the driveway awaiting pick up on the next garbage day.

 Raking leaves doesn’t seem like a common family event these days but I saw a family raking leaves this weekend and I imagine from the looks on everyone’s faces the same thoughts were mingled in amongst their piles of leaves.  No one was smiling and there was no laughter, just the persistent battle of man v nature.  Using thier rakes to defend their yard and tame the beast of leaves long enough for capture.  The only thing that has really changed it seems, is the container of choice.   The current method of containment is now the compost can, laid to rest at the end of the driveway awaiting pickup but the recycling truck.

To all those in the situation of having to rake and pick up leaves, I give you my sympathy.  To all those who have the beauty of nature and this colorful scenery in your daily lives, I ask you not take it for granted.  After all, it will be months of winter shades of white and gray before we are able to see the beautiful colors of spring!

Even this picture I took today while out and about on  a rainy day show how the colors of fall make for a nice drive to the gas station.

Fall in Washington

Maybe the sun will come back out this week and dry things off so as least Isabella can play in the leaves!

It's too wet to play! :(

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Ingredients:

• One enthusiastic dachshund (substitutions: Lab, Shih Tzu, etc.)
• One Kong
• One chew-stick (any variety)
• Peanut Butter (can be substituted with yogurt)

Directions:  Insert chew-stick through center of Kong.  Fill Kong with Peanut Butter.  Freeze until set.  Enjoy!

NOM, NOM

NOM...

NOM, NOM, NOM

ZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzz............

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Some endings are welcomed, even anticipated… much like the end of a bad movie, the end of a long week or the end of an awkward moment.  Those are the types of endings we can’t wait for.  We try to occupy our minds while waiting for them, obsessed with determining how much more we can endure.  How long we can remain focused and when will the agony end?

There are endings that are obvious and expected, although dreaded.  How about the end of a vacation?  Perhaps, even simply the end of the weekend?  Monday is all but a dirty word as Sunday evening draws to an end.

There are endings that are unexpected and heart-wrenching like the tragic loss of a loved one. (RIP my dear sweet Sasha) Under any circumstance, those are the endings we must respect and allow ourselves to accept them in whatever way we can.  They are very personal endings that no one can help us understand or accept.

Some endings linger somewhere between sad and happy or better yet, heartwarming.  The end of a good book which leaves you wanting more.  The end of a soulful love song whose words and melody haunt your thoughts for days. 

My personal favorite: the end of those peaceful dreams in which our loved ones re-appear before us.

I have found myself dreaming of Sasha a lot this weekend.  Friday morning I woke up and the realization didn’t’ hit me for a few hours that I had dreamt about her but once it did I had a wonderful day filled with warmth from within.  Saturday morning I drifted in and out of dreams several times seeing her squeak her toy and roll around in the sun.  This morning I woke slowly, knowing I was coming out of a dream, seeing her fade before me.  I tried falling back to sleep to rejoin my dream in progress but with no success.  My dreams have meant a lot to me lately.  Dreams I don’t want to wake from but eventually come to an end.  If only dreams had pause and rewind!   

I know dreams are some way related to our subconscious and it’s probably me trying to reconcile her passing…maybe the guilt of her last night on earth?  Maybe the happiness that she was in my arms for her last breaths.  I don’t really care what they mean, I’ll take what I can get!

With that my friends and family, I bid you all “ Sweet Dreams” and may they all have happy endings!

The End! :-)

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